September 7, 2011

Spiritual ambivalence (Part III)

Dear God,

With your abiding presence, I gradually overcome the ambivalence. Having recovered from isolation and  subsequently return back to the mainstream of normal life, I make it a point to be cautious in my involvement. I  even deprive myself of any involvement  that may  associate me with the past controversies. To compensate my unquenchable commitment in service, I become active in our social work professional organizations and  volunteer groups which later I lead.

You have blessed my endeavors with success as I start  to regain my confidence in leading organizations from local to regional and even reaching the national level as board of the  Philippine Association of Social Workers, Inc ( PASWI)  and National Association for Social Work Education, Inc. (NASWEI). I can  still recall  the experience of  going  to  Manila for a regular monthly board  meeting taking the first flight early morning and catching the last flight back home in order not to miss the night with my wife and growing kids.  I learn to balance my involvement with family life.

You know how glad I am when  elected to head the network of welfare and development  non-government organizations  representing  our social work association. It gives me opportunity to link with former friends and partners who are now engage in development endeavors.  Again, I have maximize my  commitment for service, as it were,  while enjoying  the new –found  partnership with  the government  which  we look at with enmity  before . You have blessed this new engagement with breakthroughs.  You  have even broadened my perspective  when  I get involve in the Provincial Development Council, as well as the Regional  Development Council.  I learn much from such experience as I widen my network  which later become useful when I return to my  first love.

Yes,  my first love - the pastoral ministry which unkind circumstances  take away from me. Amidst success in my work,  something bothers me. There is a guilt feeling of having contributed to the development of the outside world while neglecting  our community of faith. Returning to my first love is not that easy.   I can no longer recover the lost time and opportunities in working with churches. Hence, the decision to focus on pastors, guided by the belief that whatever developments in their lives will trickle down to the churches. However, my noble intention fails to erase  questions and reservation from some ministers. I fail to get the confidence of majority in my first attempt, despite  my clear and convincing direction of leadership.  Some  honestly  express their suspicion of  my past political leanings.

The experience never   dampen my spirit.  I continue my commitment to serve in some ways.  Taking cognizance of my sincerity, I get their overwhelming confidence  when in an unprecedented event, nobody dares to challenge my second attempt to leadership  and serve the association for two consecutive terms.  Having been deprived of the opportunity to serve by circumstances, I give my best. The best years I have ever given to a particular cause in my lifetime. Years that witness the commitment and dedication surpassing my other endeavors, paid or likewise voluntary in nature.

It pleases  you to  bless  our efforts with  unprecedented breakthroughs  in the organizational life and in projects and programs that galvanize  our solidarity. I focus  on improving the association. However, during my second term,  the harsh realties in the politics of our larger body confront me . The young ministers who possess  the idealism once we share in our youth challenge  my deep-seated principled stance on some issues.  Alarmed by the extent of mistrust on our leaders  due to their experiences, I find  myself on their side just as I always take principled stance in the past. Yet, my position as national leader of the pastors' association   constrains  my  full participation to their struggle. Yet, the  challenge never ceases until I  join the  politics of our larger body as independent candidate.

God, you know very well, what transpires in  the dirtiest and expensive election that ever happened in our denomination. But you let me win to bring the pastor cause in the attention of the policy making body. The experience in election and the political dynamics while  sitting in the board have reawakens my sense of justice. With the built-in trust of our association, I  advocate  the pastors' cause taking  principled stance on issues affecting the organization and Convention. This does not sit well with the ruling group. Having neutralized  leaders and personalities, and coopted  some oppositions, they have an upper hand in the leadership, policy  and decision making. They tend to lead by the tyranny of numbers quelling any attempt to block their way. Hence, I become their easy target. More so, when we frustrate  their devious scheme in many instances. Unable to cow me in various  attempts, they start  looking for weakest link in my personal life and even in family  to hit me in launching their  systematic attacks.

The stressful situation has  compounded the pressures in me. Apart from my employment and  responsibilities in voluntary organizations including our pastors association, I  open extension centers in various provinces  for pastor’s continuing education leading to masteral degree in socio pastoral ministries. There, I hold classes together with some volunteer  during week-ends and holidays. Eventually, my body gives in to  pressures.  I  become seriously ill but you snatch me from death, dear God.  Thereafter, the renewal of spiritual ambivalence  in diverse form and varying  degrees.

August 26, 2011

Spiritual ambivalence (Part II)

Dear God,

You know very well that my Christian conviction led me to the mainstream of the people’s struggle.  I joined the ranks of those who dared to go against the tide.  Most of  those who responded came from different persuasions, belief and ideologies. Many were non religious, radicals, activists, and even communists whom our  Christian circle avoided.  Against the dominant  conservative and seemingly apolitical stance of my religious denomination at that time, I  joined the ecumenical  group in solidarity  with the struggling masses.
You have seen how the ambivalence continued .

While most in the community of faith turned to prayer, if not apathy,  to guard themselves from the perceived influence of non religious  ideologues dominating the scene,I have situated  myself in the opposite  side. This might have alarmed  some brothers and sisters in faith. At one point, I was informed by a confidante, my name was included among the list of  prayer requests during their  morning devotional . The group was about to do their regular morning prayers to you when somebody saw me coming home from an overnight seminar. A member hurriedly requested for the inclusion of  my name in the prayer list because, according to her, she was so concerned that  I have already joined the underground movement. Of course, you know that after their prayer session some became  suspicious, if not fearful,  of me for having joined the infidels whose victory would eliminate the freedom of religion as foretold  by some Christians in other countries.

Indeed, you have been amused on how  we use small group prayer, sharing and meditation  a sort of gossiping session. How we tend to intrude personal  lives in the name of prayer concerns. How we deal  with issues of justice, righteousness, forgiveness and reconciliation within   our religious denomination and the outside world.  I had  the foretaste of how our leaders dispense justice   when we exposed and protested  against irregularities in our bible school. The administration retaliated by accusing us  of violation of rules and regulations i.e. smoking. While we were both  guilty,  our  lesser offense  were meted with  suspension. Of course, some members of the school board were honest enough  to appreciate our courage  to confront the irregularities and bring to their attention. Still, in their desire to  save the institution, they had to maintain the status quo until the term of the administrator ended to avoid legal battle. We were just consoled  by the thought that, in our youth, we had spared  the institution from further trouble and assured of our return after the administrator is gone.

Whether such  traumatic experience  had a bearing on my  pursuit of justice in the society, you know better than I do.  But I am certain of your presence and grace in all my struggles including the spiritual ambivalence. There was even a  time when  in our ambivalence, especially during the intensification of the struggle,  we often asked ourselves  whether we would  witness the dawn of a new day. Many of us had  already resolved  that we might  not experience it.  By your grace,  I was one of the fortunate ones who  witnessed the dawn brought about by  the EDSA Revolution.

But it was  a dazed  dawn. Because after the euphoria ,  the political and ideological struggles resumed including the witch hunting activities. Having been identified with the left, those of us who returned to the mainstream became  more vulnerable. Suspicion and cooptation from the government, on one hand because of our  past record. While, on the other hand,  an ambivalent relationship with the other side.  We have also to deal with our Christian community who felt aggrieved by our hardheadedness  to forsake the tradition. Many of us experienced  isolation and the stigma  of  labeling.  Some succumbed  to pressures while others were  victimized by psychological  warfare.  Either by will or forced by circumstances  they were  coopted and suffered isolation, threat  or reprisal from former  comrades. Worse,  when the once solid  movement  were split resulting from some bloody skirmishes, confusions and complexities. But you were there to help me survive in such ambivalence.

(To be continued)

July 7, 2011

Help… I am almost lost: A Spiritual Ambivalence?

Dear God,

I have this ambivalent feeling.  Much as I want to live a stress-free life to enhance healing, the situation calls for participation to continue the change we started.  I may  again offend  other people. I know  truth hurts and  have no intention to do such harm to anyone. It is not even my desire to always stand for what is true, just,  and right for it will surely create tension, friction and even stress. I love peace and serenity.  I even avoid stressful task and confine my life within regular work, meditation,  and blogging to compensate my physical limitation in service.

Yet, deep within me is the guilt feeling when I continue to remain silent amidst the search for truth. More so, when  only a few dare  to speak up, which can be easily marginalized, as others have already mastered the art of cover up and pacification. No wonder,  the problem has  become systemic and complicated, difficult to unwind. For in my desire to follow you, I feel motivated to make a stand for the way, the truth and the life.

I long for  the days when I have no keen knowledge on exploitation, oppression,  injustices, human rights violation in any system, be it in the government, church, organization and institution. When my life is confined to  traditional  ministry.  When my only concern is to spread the gospel and win souls for Christ. You know very well how I enjoy the life of an evangelist, going  up to the mountains, unaware of the risks, just to spread the message of God’s love and salvation and invite sinners to come home and receive redemption. When we do street preaching in season and out of season,  people’s reaction do not bother us, be it favorable or otherwise. We commit to you the result, without minding our limitations. I thought that would be my lifetime call. I always feel  motivated to preach the gospel. And  consider  everything, literally everything as fulfillment of your will, even my failures, shortcomings, or sheer  negligence in our part.

But changes come, not necessarily on my desire or quest. I was exposed to another environment where I have to wrestle with my traditional belief. It started with the  issue of multi-ministry against mono-ministry. Later,   the social gospel,  theology of  struggle/liberation and related issues.  You know very well how I resist any attempt to downgrade  my  conservative  beliefs. How I defend my position against  radical and progressive students who appear  to  undermine traditional practice in the name of change.

Ironically, in my attempt to minister to the political detainees to convert them (and testify later on how the hard core ideologues  are transformed into a conservative Christian), I experience the other way around.  My conversion  takes place, instead, not necessarily to their ideology or cause. But  the commitment in service. Their undaunted spirit  and dedication to minister  to the least of our brothers and sisters in need. They appear to be better  Samaritans than we Christians, nay, ministers. Ashamed of myself, for lacking that zeal,   I try to make amends.

Worse, the situation during my realization is different  from  the context of the Good Samaritan. The  victims are many, and unlike in the previous case, they  are not  left on  isolated place, needing help. I could have done the acts of  the Good Samaritan  in similar situation, immediately caring for the victim and exhaust all the means to save him. However, I  am a witness to the action:  the robbery, the violence, the oppression taking place. Not so many responded, some fear for their own safety as the perpetrators are too powerful and rude.

Most of  those who responded come from different persuasions, belief and ideologies.  Many are non religious,  radicals, activists, and even communists whom we Christians avoid. I can count with my fingers ministers of God from different religions.

Somehow, I feel  the shame for failure to respond immediately. At first,  I think  of waiting for the robbers to leave the victim after looting and follow the Good Samaritan. But I know it would be a long wait. The situation seems to prolong unless many more would help to overpower the perpetrators. I have no other choice but to stand to my Christian principle and conviction and pay the price. Thereafter, I always experience this ambivalence.

(to be continued)

July 3, 2011

Learning lessons on faith, justice and grace

One of the unforgettable experiences I have happened  in General Santos City, the birthplace of the world renowned Filipino boxer- congressman, Manny Pacquiao.  It was during my active years while still the national president of the Convention Baptist Ministers Association.  We were conducting continuing theological classes for pastors under the Institute for Advanced Theological Studies (IATS). The institute is an outreach arm of the College of Theology, Central Philippine University.

As one of the resource persons, I took the privilege to promote the newly designed Master of Socio Pastoral Ministries (MSPM) program for pastors. Two subjects in the seminar were assigned to me, namely: Community Organization and Strategies in Church and Community Mobilizations. These are credited to MSPM program, should participants decide to pursue the course.

Awed by the relevance of the community organizing process in their pastoral work, participants actively participated in the discussion. I was presenting the stages in community organization designed by the University of the Philippines, a premier state university in the country when interrupted by a simple looking old minister. He was so excited to share his experiences similar to the theories presented. With hesitation, he asked whether the process they did can be related to the stages discussed. When I gave the affirmation, in disbelief he blurted out: “Kon amo, maalam gali kami, Pastor?” Implying how wise/intelligent they are to rightly practice the stages even without setting their feet on the prestigious university, nor even having a formal education.

The more he was surprised when I candidly affirmed the correctness of his thoughts and their practice. Thereafter, I discussed with them the interrelatedness of theory and practice. How theories are developed through observation of experiences. Just as how these theories are put into practice. Even touching the beauty of God’s creation and design, the wisdom in nature, and learning through life’s experience including the commercialization of education.  I pointed out their God-given wisdom and natural talents, including common sense, emphasizing not to be overly dependent on theories and academic preparation or the lack of it. I believe that wonderful encounter has boasted their morale, enhanced their confidence, bridged the gap between education and practice, and inspired them to continue their respective ministries.

I recall the aforementioned experience as part of my on-going journey, as I continue to wrestle with my lingering illness vis-à-vis faith and prayer. Losing my seemingly invincible stature, either real or imagined,   my health condition has exposed my vulnerability. I have been undergoing hands- on experience on issues of faith, prayer, sufferings, care of God, and all those things which can be easily resolved theoretically/spiritually.  Now, in a situation wherein the acid test of faith is required, I have to resolve these issues:  Can my faith indeed move mountains? If not, where lies the difference? Within me, or the kind of faith that I have? The care of God is out of question, here. It has become obvious by my own survival. If not for God’s care, I don’t think I would ever survive the test.

In the process of recollection, I found myself no longer the teacher but a student that has learned a wonderful lesson on theory and practice. I am no longer concerned with the theory to support my practice, of reason and explanation for my action. I just want to relate what I believe, regardless of correctness or soundness.  I want to speak out my mind and express my belief. Later, I will just analyze it or leave to the readers that task. Hebrews 11:1 has become real to me. “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”

One  night, while having trouble with sleep, I spent the time talking to God. Unlike in past when bothered by such situation,  this time I started  thanking Him for letting me experience the painful process of recovery. The delay has caused me a lot of trouble  and mixture of  thoughts and  questions on  God’s care, and his ambivalent provision. It has also exposed my faith when it  felt  short of getting what I asked for. On the other hand, the delay has given me  lot of lessons. I have experienced  significant changes within and without.Wonderful  ideas and  concepts have been developed. I have valued  the importance of health and holistic development of self. Just as I have realized my negligence and abuse of health. Likewise,  my  view of mission and God’s purpose has dramatically changed, as well as my understanding of church, ministry vis-à-vis the Kingdom of God.

After  the  thanksgiving narrative, my thoughts  turn into the issue of  justice. I realized that the slow and  painful process, including the long wait I have experienced  are  worth  the abuses and negligence I have done to my body.  Admittedly, I have abused my health, my body, deliberately or in deliberately, consciously or not. Hence,  I could not demand  for immediate recovery. Guilty, I felt I deserve the pain,  the price to pay.

I have resolved  to undergo the process and wait for natural recovery, while learn  to value health. As I continue to pray for the full recovery  sooner or later,  the meaning of  grace is becoming clearer to me. Should God hear my prayer and grant me the full recovery soon,  it would mean grace.  God’s grace that shortens the  justice demands. I realized, this is no longer a question of my  faith, for faith is not an unreasonable demand. It is an expectation of  grace beyond justice.

June 23, 2011

Even without receiving my birthday gift, I still thank the Lord

I had been expecting much for my 57th  Birthday last month.  Having been under medication due to vulnerable health condition for more than a year, I had high hopes of receiving my long requested gift from God - full recovery on my birthday. Such expectation is not without basis. Conditions have been favorable for its realization. There is considerable progress no matter how slow.  I have been faithful to medication, except on occasional drained resources. Religiously I watch my diet, daily walking exercise and other health-related activities with few light lapses.

What more, my inner self was  subdued to wait patiently to the Lord. Negative thoughts are controllable,  other mental baggage and emotions unloaded, liberally forgiving even the seemingly unforgivable.    Like a student trying hard to maintain the passing grades until graduation, I have been expecting to get the reward on my birthday. For me, it is a fair deal.  But two weeks before the expected day, the progress was reversed.

First, my  computer bogged down, followed by my own body. Although not necessarily related (but who really knows?), both point to my vulnerability. The laptop which had been my partner through thick and thin for more than three years just turned off. Having no resources for immediate replacement of expensive part, I have to squeeze my schedule with the kids for family computer until my sister-in-law lends me her own for a particular time.  

But it did not bridge the gap, right away.  Having been attached to the previous laptop, adjustment was not easy for me.  All blogging drafts and ideas were stored in it. Despite the gradual transfer of necessary files to alternate computer, I cannot take off in blogging and idea generation.  I realized the old laptop ceased to be a mere static electronic device.  It has become a personal partner which assists me even in generating ideas and plans. It appears to have a mind of its own, hastening the formulation of plans and project completion.

For more than a year of bout with chronic ailment, aside from the bible, the laptop has been my constant companion especially when bedridden. No matter how they wished to be always at my side during those moments,   my wife and kids had to attend to work and studies related activities, respectively. But the bible and the laptop have been constant companions 24/7. Hence, the significant gap with its loss.

As if to make matters worse, when I was about to adjust with an alternative computer, my body bogged down. With limited time for computer, I found another interest – gardening and yard cleaning. Hence, after 30 minutes of morning walking exercises, I extend some minutes in cultivating a plot with spade and digging canals in preparation for rainy season. The new-found diversion enhances my sweat glands which I feel beneficial for my nerve disorder. However, one day, I might have overstretched my capacity. Subsequently, my blood pressure shot up. Thereafter, it was not stabilized until two weeks of rest.

Feeling bad about the situation, the temptation to shoot endless questions alluding to God or blame oneself   dominated my thoughts. Early morning, on my birthday, I was about to start argument with God. However,   flashbacks of past memories dominated my thoughts. The pictures of mother’s story concerning the circumstances of my birth played the scene, followed by my father’s image. Then my brothers and our only sister. Soon my wife, kids and significant people that have influenced my life.  Until my mind was flooded with beautiful memories of the past events, and people I have worked with in development work, pastoral ministry, my colleagues in social work profession. Even those people I hurt and those who have wronged me, sans the ill feelings.

Overwhelmed by the grace of God for making me survive any storm in life, I almost cried. Subdued, I lost my argument. The only words I uttered is "sorry for my unbelief, for my doubt, for complaining, for failing to fully appreciate what you have done to me. At times, blaming you. I am sorry dear God and thank you for everything. If complete healing pleases  you   as my birthday gift, you know very well how happy I will be. If not, I know you will give it to me in the fullness of time."

After my prayer,  the scenario has changed.  I found peace and assurance all things will work out for good in due time, although I don’t know when and how. But the story does not end right away.  In the afternoon of my birthday, my wife arrived from Bacolod City bringing with her   a new laptop. Her birthday  gift for me. I love it.  I did not get what I want.  Still, I thank God for giving me what I need:  my wife’s  gift to record and blog the faith journey.  

May 16, 2011

Open letter for MSPM students

Dear Pastor,

It’s more than a year that we have not met. Not only due to my health condition but also with the change of leadership in the Convention Baptist Ministers Association (CBMA) and Convention of Philippine Baptist Churches (CPBC). Having in the sideline now, I am no longer acquainted with the direction and priorities of both organizations. But this  is just  a temporary set back. With the slow but sure healing process, it won’t be long and, by the grace of God, I will resume my commitment to the full.

The  scene during the most critical moment in my life has already been embedded in my mind. When I was about to make the last breath, my final thought was: Not now, Lord. Because of my family, the CBMA, and there are many evil to fight still. God might have heard my last appeal and searched my heart that  He made me survive. The long and painful process of recovery has become a purging process to me and almost daily I experience healing inside. With this development, I become optimistic to receive the total healing soon.

And with the initial physical healing, I have started to fulfill my commitment to God for my family  in the last months. I feel the time has come for me to move the next level and do the last later. Having learned from experience, I want to move slower this time. Hence, I will focus first  on the Master of Social Pastoral Ministries (MSPM).. Our  priority is to have all those who started the program complete the requirements. While  train those  who have graduated  either to  assist or handle  another batch who signify their  interest to avail of the program. Our target is to expand to other evangelical groups and the lay leaders.

It is in this connection that I would like to invite you to a  reunion meeting and seminar on May 30, 2011, 9:00 am- 3:00 pm at Central Philippine University. I have coordinated with the University Outreach Center this activity.  Dr. Melvin M. Mangana  is very much willing to co sponsor the activity with the Learning Institute for the Fullness of life and Empowerment (LIFE), Inc. We will take charge of the food and lodging when necessary. Your counterpart  is the transportation expenses.

Please confirm attendance not later than May 20. God bless you.

In the service,


May 6, 2011

Experience is not the best teacher

Since time immemorial, experience has been acclaimed as the best teacher. Nobody dares argue. Not until somebody claims, it is the worst. I don't want to join the debate because I already found the best teacher ,i.e. life itself. A timeless, tireless, relentless and irresistible teacher, as well. Giving me lessons, despite my unwillingness to learn.

The year 2009 will long be forgotten by my family as it marks my 55th year. At the peak of my career, I felt relatively stable and fulfilled in my achievements. The ups and downs of life's experiences have increased my knowledge and honed my skills in living and serving. Unsophisticated, my direction was to receive less and give more. Beaming with confidence I have learned much, my motivation was to teach and share more.

At that time, I was about to wrap up my successful leadership as national president of the Baptist pastors affiliated with the Convention of Philippine Baptist Churches. Five years earlier, I was awarded as one of the ten outstanding social workers of the Philippines. Nothing more to ask except for longer life to continue my service. And to consolidate my experiences as registered social worker and ordained minister into books/publications . So that I can teach others also.

All of the sudden, the ecstasy was shattered by a chronic heart ailment, compounded with unusual nerve disorder in the last quarter of the aforementioned year. Three months away from our national assembly to cap my six years of service and leadership. It was a devastating experience for me and my family. The worst we ever encountered so far. Such condition has constrained my active life of service. Adding pain was the realization that we have given all in service without saving for ourselves in times of crisis.

Most of my time is spent at home due to limited mobility, making me vulnerable to discouragement and depression. This condition has been going on  for more than a year. A  wrestle  with the nagging issues of pain and suffering and search for the meaning of all these experiences in life. In solitude, I have discovered the best teacher. This is LIFE itself.

March 22, 2011

Do I have to move mountains to prove my faith?

My sickness has given me sufficient time to rest, pray, meditate, read the bible, reflect and write. All the wonderful experiences  my previous hectic schedule deprived me. Among other things, I have been grateful to God for the subsequent  inner renewal taking place in my life. My faith has been strengthened every day.

During those extreme  moments when I was bed ridden, the bible became my constant companion. It continues to be, providing new insights and inspiration, no matter how many times I go over the books, chapters and verses. Literally or symbolically, the scripture has provided me relief, guidance, assurance,  and strength.

I  cannot count the times I revisit the Gospel. So much so, at times, I find myself on the actual scene of the encounters of Jesus with harsh realities of life. It is not difficult for me to realize his frustration with established, exclusivist religious structure and leadership and the skirmishes that follow. Likewise, the consequent effect of stirring the hornet of  exploitative system which takes its toll on his life and ministry.  I understand the jubilation of his followers and the tensions created by the triumphant entry leading to his crucifixion. The inevitable price of  advocating and standing for  the way, the truth and the life. I can easily identify with his concern for the poor, the deprived, the oppressed. My social work experience and involvement in the people’s struggle during the dark years of dictatorial rule in our country make me sensitive to the situation.    

Literally, I follow his teachings on forgiveness and love even the enemies. Though difficult it may be, I enjoy  its soothing effect to my soul. Even his exhortation concerning worries about the cares of the world including the daily needs  is feasible.  Although the expected provision does not always come on time, still I continue to follow his teachings. Whereas before, skipping daily maintenance due to lack of resources made me panic. Now, I take it as part of my healing process. Of course, at times my heart complains when deprived for weeks of the medicine. But I have to assure it that all things will work together for good and wait for the provision.

Yes,  I can attest that the teachings of Jesus are relevant, feasible and worthwhile.  But I stumbled on some things. Foremost, is his teachings on faith as recorded in  Mark 11:22-24.’'Have faith in God,' Jesus answered. 'I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, "Go, throw yourself into the sea," and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."

Its realization appears to be elusive. Many times, I try but  fail. I  cannot  not even move my health condition into another level, no matter how I  apply  suggestions on the power of faith or power of  mind or a combination of both. But always, I find refuge on the belief that the fullness of time will soon come. The delay is part of God’s preparation for ministry. At times, I reflect:  Do I have  to move mountains to prove my faith?  

March 17, 2011

An invitation to blog

Hi, I am Edwin Ibanez Lariza, registered social worker and ordained baptist minister.

I am in the process of recovery from  lingering illness.  I was at the peak of  service when  attacked by chronic heart ailment, compounded by unusual nerve disorder.  Such condition has constrained my active life of service for more than a year now. Most of my time is spent at home due to limited mobility. The delay of complete healing makes me vulnerable to discouragement and depression.

A pastor- friend advised and taught me  blogging  to help the healing process.  Indeed, it works. In the process of sustaining the journal blog , my interest in writing has been revived. Hence, I  opened another blog to ventilate  my suppressed commitment to the service of the people towards development. Visit my networking for social development.

Just recently, I  am inspired to create  a sharing blog. A forum for life and  faith experiences of people who have survived the test of times and circumstances.  This is a venue for us to learn from one another and share  so that others will also find inspiration in their faith journey. Thus, this invitation to blog.